Conversations - Girl Gone Authentic


I feel change bellowing in the pits of my belly.

I try to utter words that might make you understand.

The girl you knew yesterday is no longer here.

She sailed away with the midnight wind.

Here I stand, stained blue by my new true form.

Sweet berries and rosemary, familiar scents from a past life not so distant.

I’ve met this side of me, just not in this lifetime and in this form.

How then my love do I introduce you to an old lover cloaked in skin you do not yet remember?

I tend to my garden. Herbs, teas, and potions – my favorite the pure white flower ripens.

Tangerine peels neatly stacked on the center of the table you carved for me.

Tenderly my lips make their way up to the center of your palm.

They part and l taste the sweetness of secrets laid to rest.

Will you let me put into words how much I loved you then and how much I love you now?

Silly girl, how dare you dream?

Silly girl, people like you aren’t destined for greatness.

Silly girl, you are nobody.

Love dressed in fear. Love dressed in doubt.

“Forgive me,” I whisper.

Forgive me.

I should have known You would leave as quietly as you lived with the sadness in your eyes.

But, here I am now stained blue in my true form.

You? I will not give your memory form.

I love you.

Image: Cecile Smetana Baudier for Cecilie Bahnsen

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